Showing posts with label GUILT. Show all posts
Showing posts with label GUILT. Show all posts

Saturday, October 7, 2017

GUILT WORKS


The point is, ladies and gentleman, that greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right, greed works. 


Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) with his famous quote from the 1987 film, Wall Street

Although my successful effort to put myself in the direct path of the solar eclipse on August 21st was one of the most cool things that I have ever done and felt so good at the time, I was at the same time still struggling with my inability to find the person within myself that knew how to exercise and eat properly. Back then I let yet another week slip by before I seriously rededicated myself to reversing the nasty weight gain that showed no sign of abating. On August 28th, I finally reached the point where I was completely disgusted with myself, and I weighed 263.3 lbs. It took another couple of days, on September 2, before I gingerly strapped on my backpack and took a walk. I was honestly scared. I had gone so far backwards with my weight, and I had been so lazy during the summer months that I wasn't even sure if I could take a ten mile walk without a struggle. Since that day, I have not missed a day. and since September 2, according to my calculations I have walked or hiked more than 340 miles. I have eaten much better, as I have rediscovered something I lost when I was packing on the pounds all the way back up to 263.3 - I rediscovered 'guilt.'  Guilt is a powerful motivator. Without guilt, one can eat 20 Oreo Cookies in an afternoon. That cannot be accomplished quite so easily when one is burdened with guilt. The point, ladies and gentlemen, is that Guilt, for lack of a better word, is good. Guilt is right, guilt works.

I am continuing to make progress. Today, I stepped on my scale and my weight is now:

244.9 lbs

The last time I weighed 'this little' was earlier this year on March 25, more than six months ago. I have lost nearly 20 lbs since my self-disgust reached its apex on August 28. I am improving. This weight loss journey, this blog began on December 24, 2014. That was the day that my self-disgust reached an apex too. The thing is, on that day I weighed 309 lbs. So you ask where is the improvement? My apex of self-disgust has dropped by 45 lbs. I do realize, of course, that it might be better, if I simply avoid ever reaching an apex of self-disgust.  Yes, I know that. But I do have to deal with the situation at hand. As happy as I am today to weigh 244.9 lbs, I know too, that once I get down to the 220's or 230's - I will once again be disgusted with the weight that I am today. But that's in the future. Today, I am pleased. If you can follow this semi-logical reasoning, that is fine. If you cannot, don't worry about it. It probably only makes sense to me.






During my early Friday evening urban hike, I passed the Logan Square Dog Park.  The complete mural facing the dog park  depicting all different breeds of dogs is 300 feet long and 17 to 23 feet high.




Your Food Diary For:

BREAKFAST Calories
kcal
Carbs
g
Fat
g
Protein
g
Sodium
mg
Sugar
g
Quaker Oats instant grits - Instant Grits 400 88 6 8 1,240 0

400 88 6 8 1,240 0
L U N C H
Sushi - Eel and Avacodo Roll 400 33 18 22 0 0

400 33 18 22 0 0
D I N N E R
Popeyes - Chicken Strips 500 26 24 45 2,001 0

500 26 24 45 2,001 0
S N A C K S
Harvest Snaps Snapea Crisps - Wasabi      200 29 9 9 150 2

200 29 9 9 150 2
Totals 1,500 176 57 84 3,391 2
Your Daily Goal 3,669 458 122 184 2,300 137
Remaining 2,169 282 65 100 -1,091 135
Calories
kcal
Carbs
g
Fat
g
Protein
g
Sodium
mg
Sugar
g
*You've earned 1,739 extra calories from exercise today

If every day were like today...   You'd weigh 215.4 lbs in 5 weeks     




Tuesday, March 21, 2017

GOOD GRIEF

Lefty liberals in America are in one of the seven 'stages of grief' over the recent presidential election of November 2016. Actually, now that I think of it, it appears that most of them are still in shock and denial. The 'stages of grief' are more commonly used to describe the emotions one feels after losing a loved one. Surely Hillary Clinton does not really qualify as a 'loved one.' Or maybe she does. Who knows?



1. Shock and Denial
2. Pain and Guilt
3. Anger and Bargaining
4. Depression, Reflection and Loneliness
5. The UPWARD TURN
6. Reconstruction and Working Through
7. Acceptance and Hope

I am going through my own stages of grief of a sort as I come to grips with how far backwards I have retrogressed with my weight management in recent weeks and months. More than two years ago, I  'discovered' the secret to weight loss. Eat Less, Exercise more, lose one pound at a time.

Apparently the secret to weight gain, which is a polar opposite, is still similar. Eat more, exercise less, gain one pound at a time.

I think I am at Stage 5 - THE UPWARD TURN. I sincerely hope that I am beyond Step 4, depression.  Depression is certainly not productive. 

I have publicly proclaimed many times over the past months, that 'this time I am serious.'   I simply cannot face a continuing charge backward up the wrong hill.

My weight was 247 lbs on Saturday three days ago. This is a major step backwards from where I have more recently been as recently as last October when I was below 220 lbs.  It is probably part of 'BARGAINING' that I constantly remind myself that I was once 309 lbs. At this point in my life, this is no longer the weight that I want to compare myself to.  I have to accept how far backwards I have traveled and I have to have the hope that I can get back on track. I am certain that more dedication is required than more hope. 


Your Food Diary For:


BREAKFAST Calories
kcal
Carbs
g
Fat
g
Protein
g
Sodium
mg
Sugar
g
Kirkland - Pre-Cooked Bacon 200 0 15 15 875 0
Egg - Poached Eggs 300 2 20 25 630 1

500 2 35 40 1,505 1
L U N C H
Homemade - Beef and Bean Burrito  600 50 47 77 2,000 0

600 50 47 77 2,000 0
D I N N E R
Fresh Express - Chopped Kit - Asian Salad 360 45 27 9 690 24
Blackberries 100 22 1 3 2 11

460 67 28 12 692 35


Totals 1,560 119 110 129 4,197 36
Your Daily Goal 2,250 281 75 113 2,300 84
Remaining 690 162 -35 -16 -1,897 48
Calories
kcal
Carbs
g
Fat
g
Protein
g
Sodium
mg
Sugar
g

       Your Exercise Diary for:


Cardiovascular Minutes Calories Burned
60 406

   
Daily Total / Goal 60 / 30 406 / 590  
Weekly Total / Goal 60 / 210 406 / 4,130