Before I begin my mostly mediocre mental musings for the day, I have personal messages for two very important people (in chronological order). Let me wish a very Happy Mother's Day to my Mother who brought me into existence and has provided some direction and kindness to me for nearly 59 years. I would like to also wish a heartfelt Happy Mother's day to my Wife, who has been a terrific mother to my daughter. I don't say 'thank you' enough for all the good you have done in shaping our daughter's character - this day has a way of focusing the mind on what it important.
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ansgst
äNG(k)st
noun
- a feeling of deep anxiety or dread, typically an unfocused one about the human condition or the state of the world in general.
synonyms: anxiety, fear, apprehension, worry, foreboding, trepidation, malaise,disquiet, disquietude, unease, uneasiness
- informala feeling of persistent worry about something trivial."my recent small incremental weight gains have caused me angst"
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| The angst felt by Godzilla in this cartoon is more or less how I have been feeling lately. |
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Back in the 'old days' last year when I was dropping weight each week, I fantasized about a career change. I foresaw myself as a weight loss guru. All of sudden, weight loss seemed within my grasp and fairly straightforward. I thought I could help other people. In fact, that was part of the reason that I started this blog. I thought that the blog would keep me focused and that others that might visit this blog would find some inspiration. I am being completely serious. Now I am in crisis, as I have found it increasingly difficult to control my appetite. Yesterday my scale indicated a 241.9 pounds - that was definitely a measurement sufficient in ruining my day. This morning, my scale indicated 240.0 pounds. I know that I did not lose two pounds overnight - just in the same way that I did not believe that my weight was really nearly 242 pounds yesterday morning. Nevertheless, it is amazing how this particular number has improved my outlook on life. If I remain positive and rational, I should be able to steer myself in the right direction again. I might be able to explain my extra difficulties in recent weeks by the inability to exercise at the level that I had previously maintained. Going forward I have to believe that I will have more positive results. At least in the past 24 hours my 'angst' level has been reduced from where it was yesterday. 240 looks a lot better than 241.9.
Your Food Diary For:
| BREAKFAST | Calories | Carbs | Fat | Protein | Sodium | Sugar | |
| Malt-o-meal Cereal - Honey Nut Scooters | 480 | 96 | 6 | 12 | 840 | 36 | |
| Sage - Red Delicious Apple, 1 medium apple | 95 | 25 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 19 | |
| 575 | 121 | 6 | 13 | 842 | 55 | ||
| L U N C H | |||||||
| Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich | 520 | 70 | 30 | 18 | 700 | 26 | |
| 520 | 70 | 30 | 18 | 700 | 26 | ||
| D I N N E R | |||||||
| Chunky - Manhattan Clam Chowder | 240 | 36 | 6 | 10 | 1,600 | 6 | |
| Jason's Deli - Flatbread Crackers | 500 | 60 | 20 | 20 | 950 | 10 | |
| 740 | 96 | 26 | 30 | 2,550 | 16 | ||
| S N A C K S | |||||||
| Apples - Apples, 3 medium apple | 240 | 66 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 48 | |
| 240 | 66 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 48 | ||
| Totals | 2,075 | 353 | 62 | 61 | 4,092 | 145 | |
| Your Daily Goal | 2,268 | 283 | 75 | 114 | 2,300 | 85 | |
| Remaining | 193 | -70 | 12 | 53 | -1,791 | -59 | |
| Calories | Carbs | Fat | Protein | Sodium | Sugar | ||
| *You've earned 338 extra calories from exercise today | |||||||
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