DAY THREE

It's a bit early for me to announce, even if only to myself, that this time (yet again) I am serious. However, I have eaten 'properly' for three days, and it has been a very long, long time since I have been able to say that. Yesterday in a hotel room while watching Star Wars Rougue One on netflix, I did what I used to do. In lieu of a taking a walk, I stepped in place during the two hour movie. By the time the rebels has successfully taken ownership of the plans to the Death Star, I had accumulated 15000 steps. I am sure that this bit of exercise is not quite the same thing as actually walking, but I am also convinced that this bit of exercise is better than sitting on a couch while watching TV.

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Your Food Diary For:

Wednesday, August 30, 2017

BREAKFAST	Calories kcal	Carbs g	Fat g	Protein g	Sodium mg	Sugar g
Essential Everyday - Butter Flavored Grits	200	42	2	4	680	2
	200	42	2	4	680	2
L U N C H
Real Foods - Corn Thins - Original, 25 slices	575	100	5	15	388	0
Oki Sushi - Spicy California Maki	300	37	7	7	390	8
	875	137	12	22	778	8
D I N N E R
Pampa Brand - Asparagus Spears	30	4	0	4	680	0
Campbell's Chunky Soup  Hearty Beef Barley	280	48	3	16	1,580	12
	310	52	3	20	2,260	12
S N A C K S
Red Delicious Apple, 1 medium apple	95	25	0	1	2	19
	95	25	0	1	2	19
Totals	1,480	256	17	47	3,720	41
Your Daily Goal	1,983	248	66	100	2,300	74
Remaining	503	-8	49	53	-1,420	33
	Calories kcal	Carbs g	Fat g	Protein g	Sodium mg	Sugar g
	*You've earned 53 extra calories from exercise today

If every day were like today...   You'd weigh 243.7 lbs in 5 weeks     

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DAY TWO

Well, two days are banked. Two days when I started to remember that which I never forgot but simply ignored.  Two days when I ate normally. On Monday my caloric intake was under 1000 calories.   I remember from experience, that this is too much (in fact, it is too little!) Tuesday was a bit more real as my calories were just under 1400. In order to be successful (again) I will need to make choices that do not leave me craving food all the time. The thing is, as I started to make poorer and poorer choices, eating more and more garbage, I found myself where I have been all my life - constantly hungry and never satisfied.  Sure, it has only been two days that I am making the choice to cut out the junk - I did not feel hungry. Is it possible that I already feel a bit better? My imagination? Placebo effect? Who knows? Who cares? I like a good placebo.

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Your Food Diary For:

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

BREAKFAST	Calories kcal	Carbs g	Fat g	Protein g	Sodium mg	Sugar g
Essential Everyday - Butter Flavored Grits	200	42	2	4	680	2
	200	42	2	4	680	2
L U N C H
Little Salad Bar - Asian Chopped Salad	385	46	21	7	1,190	25
Corned Beef & Cabbage	200	11	9	18	468	0
	585	57	30	25	1,658	25
D I N N E R
Little Salad Bar - Asian Chopped Salad	385	46	21	7	1,190	25
	385	46	21	7	1,190	25
S N A C K S
Quaker - Chewy Granola 90 Calories	90	19	2	1	80	7
Sage - Red Delicious Apple	95	25	0	1	2	19
	185	44	2	2	82	26
Totals	1,355	189	55	38	3,610	78
Your Daily Goal	1,930	241	64	97	2,300	72
Remaining	575	52	9	59	-1,310	-6
	Calories kcal	Carbs g	Fat g	Protein g	Sodium mg	Sugar g

If every day were like today...   You'd weigh 243 lbs in 5 weeks

SEEMS LIKE OLD TIMES

It's been awhile... yesterday seemed like old times. My caloric intake was under 1000 calories. This is absolutely not my daily goal, but I did think that it might be a good idea make a drastic change to my recent behaviour to convince myself that I was serious.  My steps count on my fitbit was not too impressive - but this is what it looks like when someone has gone so far backwards that they have to claw their way back. I am in clawing mode.

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Your Food Diary For:

Monday, August 28, 2017

BREAKFAST	Calories kcal	Carbs g	Fat g	Protein g	Sodium mg	Sugar g
Essential Everyday - Butter Flavored Grits	200	42	2	4	680	2
	200	42	2	4	680	2
L U N C H
Oki Sushi - Spicy California Maki	300	37	7	7	390	8
	300	37	7	7	390	8
D I N N E R
Corned Beef & Cabbage, Beef and Vegetables	400	21	18	36	936	0
	400	21	18	36	936	0
S N A C K S
Red Delicious Apple	95	25	0	1	2	19
	95	25	0	1	2	19
Totals	995	125	27	48	2,008	29
Your Daily Goal	1,930	241	64	97	2,300	72
Remaining	935	116	37	49	292	43
	Calories kcal	Carbs g	Fat g	Protein g	Sodium mg	Sugar g

MARC DAMNIT!

from the urban dictionary....

god damnit 

The phrase "God Damnit", which when expressed in a grammatically correct fashion would read "God Damn It," is a vulgarity used to express frustration. It's literal definition is "May the Christian God Damn it to Hell". In slang, it is a phrase used in a generally non-religious context. For example, if one cannot get an electronic device to work properly, one might exclaim "God Damnit!", meaning that you are so upset with the device you wish that God would condemn it to eternal damnation.
It is rarely used literally, and is considered a lesser of vulgarities, though to the extremely religious it is considered highly offensive. In the Christian faith it is considered a violation of one of the ten commandments.
"I can't get this VCR to work! God Damnit!"

There is no god responsible for the backwards march of my weight. There is one person responsible. Me. Marc. My title of today's blog post, Marc Damnit is meant to show that I am upset with me.  and me only.  There is a solution to this. Stop being a jerk. I did not forget how to manage my weight. I simply stopped. I made hundreds of wrong decisions. I lost weight making hundreds of good decisions. So today, I declare that I am going to REVERSE the direction of my weight. (again)
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This morning, the scale said: 263.3 lbs.  I was sad when my weight crested over 240 lbs. I was sadder when it crested over 250 lbs. I was devastated when my weight crested over 260 lbs. The thing about losing weight is this: When I make my first initial success getting under 260 lbs. I will oddly be happy. No check that... not happy.... happier... no check that... less devastated... ah heck... Let me just be happy. First I have to get (back) there.  Once I get back under 260 lbs, then I will worry how I should feel about it.

I will begin again today by carefully watching what I eat and logging everything just like I used to when I was so successful in the past.

ECLIPSE

Totality. My family needed to be 350 miles away from Chicago to see totality. We bucked the traffic trend from northern Illinois and drove northeast to St Clair, Missouri after spending a couple of days in Branson. The difference between seeing a 99% eclipse and totality is huge. While the slimmest sliver of the sun is showing, you need your protective goggles. When totality begins, you enjoy the show with your naked eye. I didn't remember to experience everything. I was unaware of the sounds of cicadas ratcheting up. The temperature did drop in the last moments before the sun disappeared altogether. The bright sunshine of the day made it feel like the light of the last few moments of a day before the sun hides under the horizon. It took a lot of effort to get this experience and it was well worth it. The weather forecast was depressing with 24 hours to go, but miraculously, on the dot on the map that my family selected to experience this, the sun was shining brightly when it counted. This photo is not mine. It was the closest photo that I could find online so that I could remember what I did see with my naked eyes. My next eclipse posting will be April 8, 2024. I will likely recount my adventures from somewhere in Ohio. One thing I might do differently next time? Find a hotel room to stay over wherever I am after the event. That 350 mile trip home from St Clair, Missouri to Chicago took about 11 hours.
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This blog that I did everyday for nearly two years was a good idea. It was a very bad idea to cease blogging. The blog kept me in check. My weight this morning is 261 lbs. Oh yeah, I started at 309 llbs a long time ago. So technically I could say that I lost 47 lbs. The problem is, my low weight was under 220 lbs. So really, I have recently gained 40 lbs. Within a day, a week or sometime soon... I am going to rededicate myself to a eating healthy and exercising. Why this blog was so important to keeping my focused? I don't know... I just was. I will be back.