BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE A PIRATE!

Today after my workout I put on a white shirt that I had packed for my trip. I should not have been surprised that it was so ill-fitting. It used to be my favorite dress shirt when I was north of 300 lbs.  It is made from particularly soft comfortable cotton fabric, the sleeve length is extra long, 37" (very hard to find, but my favorite sleeve length when I can find them)  The shirt was huge on me. The shirt was was truly two sizes too big.  I simply did not look my best today.  I reminded myself of the 'Puffy/Pirate Shirt' that Jerry Seinfeld had to wear on The Today Show as part of the fictional story from the 'Seinfeld' TV Show.

Jerry Seinfeld: 'But I don't want to be a pirate.'

For those like me who remember this funny episode with the 'low-talker' I have captured some of the original dialog from the the original script, 'The Puffy Shirt.'

KRAMER: You're not going to believe what happening with Leslie. You know, ever since you agreed to wear the puffy shirt on the Today show, she's been getting

all these orders from boutiques and department stores..

JERRY: Uh-huh.. (Finally realizes what Kramer said, he looks up) Since I said what?

KRAMER: Agreed to wear the puffy shirt. (Starts unzipping the suit cover)

JERRY: What are you talking about?

KRAMER: When you said that you'd agree to wear the puffy shirt on the Today show. (Takes the ridiculous puffy shirt out of the cover)

JERRY: (Goes up to it) This?

KRAMER: Yes!

JERRY: I agreed to wear this?!

KRAMER: Yeah, yeah.

JERRY: But, when did I do that?

KRAMER: When we went to dinner the other night.

JERRY: What are you, crazy?!

KRAMER: What were you talking about when I went to the bathroom?

JERRY: I don't know! I couldn't understand a word she was saying! I was just nodding!

KRAMER: There you go.

JERRY: Where I go? You mean she was asking me to wear this ridiculous shirt on national TV, and I said 'Yes'?!

KRAMER: Yes, yes! You said it!

JERRY: But, I - I didn't know what she was talking about. I couldn't hear her!

KRAMER: (Takes it off the hook, and starts walking toward Jerry with it. He backs defensively backs away from it) Well, she asked you.

JERRY: I - I can't wear this puffy shirt on TV! I mean, look at it! It looks ridiculous!

KRAMER: Well, you gotta wear it now! All those stores are stocking it based on the condition that you're gonna wear this on the TV show! The factory in New Jersey is already makin' them!

JERRY: They're making these?!

KRAMER: Yes, yes. This pirate trend that she's come up with, Jerry, - this is gonna be the new look for the 90's. You're gonna be the first pirate!

JERRY: (Like a little kid) But, I don't want to be a pirate!

The shirt I wore today, wasn't quite as 'puffed-up' but it still managed to look a bit ridiculous on me.  The neck size was nearly 3" too big.   Looks, like 'Goodwill' has another donation coming from me.

My shirt wasn't quite as 'puffed up' as Jerry's - still, it was clearly two sizes too big.

WEDNESDAY MENU

breakfast      SHMURAH MATZO, Pink Salmon packet                                          270 calories

lunch            Pink Salmon packet                                                                              180 calories

dinner          SUBWAY chicken spinach salad, Italian Wedding Soup, Asparagus   540 calories

total calories consumed 990 calories

CALORIES BURNED

YMCA 5:30AM elliptical machine, INTERVAL setting, 2.77 distance'  - 35 minutes 470 calories

Yesterday I had to be at the YMCA @ 5:30AM in order to give myself time to workout and shower and then drive 90 minutes to my 8:30AM appointment.  I suspected that I would have no time between my two appointments - so my lunch was a PINK SALMON packet that I ate while my first appointment was winding down in the mid-afternoon.

WEDNESDAY NET CALORIES   520 CALORIES